On the Couch with CA

  If ever you thought that fainting is like Swan Lake's dying swan, just quickly discard that thought, because believe me, it is more like one of Quinton Tarantino's gory movies.   Prior to Saturday, I was not feeling well and could feel that my body was telling me something major was about to happen to me.  Take note - listen when your body speaks, because if you don't, it is going to come back to bite you in the you know where - literally and figuratively.   Anyway in the early hours of Saturday morning, the bathroom was calling me with vengeance and I was not sure if I was suppose to sit or stand.  Anyhow, whatever was wanting to get  out of me, got out, both through the backdoor and the front door at the same time.   PS - are you still with me on this, or are you on the floor rolling with laughter?    This went on for a while and then I cleaned myself up and got back into bed only to be joined a few minutes later...

I finally got to see Mandela's Long Walk to Freedom on the big screen and it brought back memories of a very hard journey that my country South Africa ( "SA" ) went through and moments of nostalgia when elections came around in 1994.  Some of the journey I got to experience as a child, a youth and as a young adult in turbulent SA. 1976 brought about the Soweto uprising followed by many boycotts of SA products across the world.  I will never forget one day just after school when I stood with two of my siblings on the stoep (porch) with my grandmother, when some army men drove past and pointed their guns at us in a joking manner.  It was definitely no joke looking at their guns.   In the 80s  I participated in a school boycott and quickly got to understand what the "fight"  was all about in SA.  It did not take me long to get involved in organising and participating in youth rallies.  I was more of a behind-the-scenes pe...

  A week into the new year and I was almost back into 2013, but thankfully quickly came to my senses and pulled myself out of it.  I have made a promise to myself that I am not going to allow myself to be emotionally bullied.   People who make choices that don't take your feelings into consideration and still expect you to be there for them are not worth having in your life.  It was a very tough decision to make on my part to walk away but walk away is what I am doing.    Life is not always an easy ride, but it can be an enjoyable one, when you have all the right people in your life.    We need to take ownership of our own lives before we can take responsibility for someone else's.  It has taken me a long time to realise that I cannot control the world but I can let the world sit back and watch how I enjoy my life even when lemons are thrown at me.  What the world does not realise is that I love lemons. Mouth w...

So I made it pass the midnight hour in one piece. I welcomed the arrival of the New Year by myself on the couch and then slowly dozed off and awoke to a quiet world.   I guess all the party-goers are still in dreamland. It has been a while since I blogged anything and I feel a bit at a loss for words even though there is so much I would like to say. 2013 has come and gone and although it was emotionally challenging, I somehow feel a lot stronger than the year before that.  The challenge I now face is letting go and to concentrate on me, because the only person in this point in time who finds me important, is me.  Sure I have friends who are looking out for my well-being but they are not the ones having to walk in my shoes (when they are not broken) everyday.  They have their own lives to live. Every year we make a list of our new year’s resolutions and every year most of us still repeat the same things we were hoping to change or let go of.  I hope ...